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Blog
When a Funeral Director Grieves
As we begin Holy Week in these uncertain and difficult times I continue to reflect on Saint Joseph of Arimathea. On the day of Jesus death, following his crucifixion, Joseph went to Pontius Pilate and requested Jesus' body. With Pilate’s permission, Joseph recovered the Body of Jesus, prepared him for burial and laid his remains to rest in his own tomb. He did this as the apostles of Jesus were in hiding. This act is the reason St Joseph of Arimathea is considered the patron saint of Funeral Directors and Morticians. This year, even more than others, the story of St Joseph of Arimathea truly reflects that of which all funeral directors are currently experiencing. During this time of pandemic while all are in quarantine the job of a funeral director is still an essential and important job. Just as St Joseph of Arimathea attained the body of Jesus and buried his body privately while all others were in hiding we are having to do the same. This isn’t how the burial process should be but it’s how it has to be. Grieving loss and celebrating lives have changed drastically in the last month. The public visitations that were once an essential part of the grieving process has now ceased. The current rule mandates only 10 people at a private visitation or graveside service. When we are notified of a death we are taking the deceased into our care from nursing homes and hospitals with no family present. As funeral directors it is heart wrenching to see services without proper memorials honoring the deceased (I.e. military honors, church services, family and friends gathering). We recognize the urgency of social distancing as the virus continues to spread and we continue our work through the process. We look to Saint Joseph of Arimathea for strength to honor the deceased privately as he did for Jesus now and prepare to honor and celebrate them at future memorial services once this is over. During this time we ask you all to please keep those mourning the loss of their loved ones privately, in your hearts and in your prayers. Reach out however you can to send your condolences whether it’s on our website, Facebook, text message or phone call. Keep their memory alive by telling their stories just as you would during a visitation and when this is over, attend the memorial services of those we have lost during this time so we can properly mourn their lives. -Victoria Ordoyne Thomas Ordoyne Funeral Home Thibodaux, Louisiana Merciful God, whose servant Joseph of Arimathea with reverence and godly fear, prepared the body of our Lord and Savior for burial, and laid it in his own tomb: Grant to us, your faithful people, grace and courage to love and serve Jesus with sincere devotion all the days of our life; through Jesus Christ our Lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, for ever and ever.
Benefits of Preplanning: Planning ahead and being prepared is a very natural aspect of life. Most people wouldn’t go on a family vacation without some planning involved ; wedding planning is essential to make sure everything goes smoothly. We plan special events such as birthday parties, baby showers, retirement events and even small things such as your outfit for the next day. We want everything to run smoothly in life so wouldn’t it be great to know it would run that smoothly after you are gone. Pre planning your funeral arrangements is so beneficial to both you and your family. The peace of mind knowing everything is planned just as you would want. Whatever your wishes may be; burial or cremation, casket and/or urn, obituary information, which church or facility, mass or celebration of life all the way down to which clothing you want to wear and the music you want played. When a family walks in the funeral home and their loved ones services have already been planned for them by the deceased a weight is lifted off their shoulders. They know the services will be exactly like their loved one wanted because their loved one planned it themselves. Options of Preplanning: Prepayment: Here at Ordoyne Funeral Home we have many options for paying in advance. You can choose a one time payment or monthly, annual or semi annual payment plans with options of 3,5,8 or 10 year payments. Our plans are insured which means if you pass before it is payed off the services you chose are covered. If you prepay your funeral with us whether a one time pay or monthly pay your services are guaranteed and locked in at today’s price. This means if your funeral plans price goes up before you pass your family does NOT have to come up with the money to pay this difference. Already have life insurance to pay your funeral expenses? You do not have to pre pay to pre plan. You can come and fill out all of your information and choose all of your merchandise and we will keep it on file without a Preneed paid policy. At the time of your passing your family still knows exactly what your wishes are and can use your life insurance to pay for your services. Transferable Preneeds: We are so proud to be here to serve you. Our family has been in the funeral business for well over 60 years in the Thibodaux and Houma area. You may have arranged a loved ones funeral with us elsewhere and you may now wish to use our family to serve yours in the future. But you already have a Preneed policy at another funeral home so what do you do? Pre need and pre planned funeral policies are fully transferable to any funeral home you wish to handle your services at absolutely no hassle to you and your family. A pre need policy is very similar to a life insurance policy where as you can choose whichever funeral home you wish to assign that. We guarantee any pre need policy from other funeral homes for the same service and merchandise chosen there. We are honored to serve you and want every family to get the care that they deserve. We promise to serve your family with the utmost concern and professionalism before during and after you or your loved ones services. We are available any day of the week or after hours to sit down with you to help preplan your funeral. Call or feel free to stop by our facility at any time to get a free Preplanning funeral packet and to find out more about your Preplanning options.
The days following a loved one’s passing are often shockingly difficult. Not only are you dealing with the emotional devastation that comes with the loss, but there are dozens of details that must be attended to in the aftermath of a death. Notifying family and friends, taking care of financial details, making arrangements for children, other loved ones, or pets if necessary. And of course, planning for the loved one’s final arrangements. In some cases the loved one has already made plans for their final arrangements, but in many cases after a loved one’s passing, family members must decide how to handle the funeral, disposition (burial, cremation, entombment, etc.), and final resting place based on family input and any last wishes made known by the loved one. Things like: ● Are there any prearrangement plans left by the loved one? ● Is a cremation or a burial right for my loved one? ● Is there a burial plot or cremation memorialization option already purchased? If not, do we need or want one? ● What kind of service do we want to have for our loved one? The emotional nature of a death coupled with the number of decisions and planning that inevitably occur after a death often leave families confused and weary. Many families waiver on the importance of having a service, especially if their loved one wanted to be cremated. However, the power of a service reverberates through family and friends and can offer lasting positive benefits. Here are 5 reasons families are having services for their loved ones whether there is a cremation or not. 1. Support from others In a time of grieving, it’s important for the family to get support from their community. A service creates a place and time for others to show they care about the well being of those who are hurting. Family and friends can gather to rekindle connections, share memories, and show love to those who need it. Showing support to those in your community who have lost a loved one at a service strengthens connections and demonstrates to those mourning that they are not in this difficult journey alone. 2. A space to celebrate life Sometimes families decide to have a service or celebration of life at a future time rather than immediately after the death. This allows far flung friends and family to travel. Families choose a specific day to get friends and family together in celebration of a life well lived. This can be a birthday, an anniversary, or other significant day. A celebration of life gives family and friends a hopeful space to share fond memories of their loved one, tell funny stories about them, and shed light on the positive aspects of that person’s life. Picking a specific day helps give those grieving a time for remembrance, and allows a healthy balance for starting to heal. 3. Begin the healing process Many choose to have a service because a service is a safe and supportive environment to express deep emotion and begin the healing process. The judgement-free space welcomes those to grieve in a spectrum of ways. We can share with you ways others have planned and personalized services with grief and healing in mind. Having a service also creates a space for friends or acquaintances to begin healing as well and to pay condolences to close family and friends of the loved one. Some have said that having a service reduces the number of people who approach close family and friends to express their condolences later. Many people prefer a service so they aren’t approached as often at the grocery store, at work, on the street, at church, or while out to eat with condolences from community members. 4. Helps provide a sense of closure A service gives the family and friends of the loved one who’s passed a place to say their goodbyes, talk about their feelings, and have a final word about the importance of this person in their lives. It’s the closing of a chapter and the beginning of a new season of healing. It’s not the end of the grief process, but instead perhaps the first step into a new period. The service provides those mourning with a chance to understand their pain, and overcome the pain with hope for the future. 5. Acknowledges the immense change a death causes Losing someone close to you is often transformative. It flips your world upside down and can create a dramatic shift in day-to-day being. Having a service ceremonially acknowledges the tear this loss creates in the fabric of our lives. The community support and acknowledgement of this immense loss can begin to stitch the pieces left behind back together. No matter the loss, having support from those in your community will strengthen everyone, and empower those who need it.
